Wednesday, 29 January 2014

Day 35 (07/01): Ban Houayxay, Laos - Chiang Mai, Thailand

Day 35 (07/01)

I'm at the Thai entry point on the other side of the Mekong, and the immigration official is leafing through my UK passport with a stern, but puzzled look emerging on his face. He talks in Thai to his colleague then addresses me abruptly:

"Where's your Laos visa? Mmh?"

I pull my Australian passport from my bag.

"Aaaah. Two passport!", they both say in unison. "Why you enter Laos with Australian passport but try to enter Thailand with UK?", he queries.

"The Laos visa was cheaper on my Australian passport but it only gives me 14 days no-visa entry to Thailand. My British passport gives me 30 days in Thailand, which I need because I leave on the 29th, that's more than 14 days away", I explain to them, starting to get worried.

"No. You need to enter Thailand with the passport which has Lao visa", he responds.

"But why should it matter which passport I enter or leave on? I legally hold both these passports, I should be allowed to use whichever one I chose". I'm getting a little high and mighty I must admit, but I do not like the prospect of having to do an expensive and time-consuming visa run to Burma in the short time I have left on this trip.

The manager is called, I stand my ground, and luckily she's an understanding lady and allows me to enter on my UK passport as long as they have a copy of my Laos visa from my other passport.

After thanking the border staff profusely and exchange wai's I, with my 30-day pass, walk through to Thailand, the third, and last country on this Southeast Asian journey.

I wait a long while for my minivan and eventually we're off towards Chiang Mai, where I plan to spend a few nights and catch up with Nic, whom I met way back in Sihanoukville in the company of the Slovakians.

It's already noticeably much hotter here than the cold temperatures experienced in Laos. The yellow rice fields shimmer, and I can see mirages on the roads, which, I notice, are very well maintained. I see already the signs of a country with a growing economy - the roads, cars, houses - it's all of a higher standard than in Cambodia and Laos.

I close my eyes with the window open and let the warm air push past me, and the feeling is like when I float on my back in the ocean. I open my eyes again, and see the mountains far away, and the jungle, and the rice fields, and even pine trees, and a leafless tree with bright red flowers which reminds me of an Illawarra Flame Tree in full bloom and transports me back to Gerringong and my family and the summers of my childhood.


I arrive in Chiang Mai, and I'm swimming in hectic traffic again. Not since Phnom Penh have I seen traffic like this, and I jump into a tuk tuk and head to a guest house which Nic recommended, a joint called Pirate's Cove run by a relaxed German fellow. The traffic feels like Phnom Penh, but here there are so many more tourists here, and the sex tourism I saw in other places, I realise now, was nothing compared to this. Old white men with young Thai women on every block, in nearly every bar I pass, even the owner of the guest house has a young Thai wife. But Kim the German and his wife, I notice straight away, seem to have a very healthy, affectionate relationship.

Kim tells me Nic has already paid the money for my first night here, just so I could be guaranteed the room; a surprising, but humbling gesture. I send him a message to thank him and ask if he's available to catch up already. He tells me he's not, he'll see me tomorrow morning, but he suggests I go explore the local neighbourhood, "Just down the road there's hookers, good food, bars, and massage, that should keep you busy" he writes back tongue-in-cheek.

I skip the hooker, bars, and massage, but I do find a place to help with my still barely satiable appetite for noodle soups. I slurp the noodles up out of a pastel blue plastic bowl, sip on chrysanthemum tea, dash in some more chili, and look forward to catching up with Nic tomorrow.


Another country, another tuk tuk

Day 34 (06/01): Pakbeng - Ban Houayxay, Laos

Day 34 (06/01)

While yesterday the boat was filled out predominantly by tourists, today we are only a handful, with locals occupying the rest of the seats. There are two orange monks, women feeding babies on rugs in the middle of the aisle, and we stop many times to pick up and drop off others - sometimes a man will ask to be dropped off at a rock, onto which he leaps from the boat as it's practically still moving. At one stop, next to a huge smoke-vomiting factory, a curious mix of highland minorities climb on board. One man is wearing an ornately embroidered traditional tunic, another has brought his rooster with him, which he keeps tethered to the side-rail for the rest of the trip. It's a fine, majestic creature which stands on the rail elegantly, chest puffed out, scarlet comb proud on his head, glossy emerald tail feathers shaking in the river breeze.

The back of the captain's jacket reads 'Endoscopy Team'.

I realise we're now going along the Thai/Laos border. The landscape becomes much flatter, there are signs of large-scale agriculture, the jungle thins out and disappears completely; hell, I even see power lines for the first time.

We climb up one more steep, sandy bank to arrive in Houayxay, a border town and the final destination of our two-day boat trip.

I find my guest house and walk up and down the main street. Elephant happy pants are everywhere on this backpacker trail. Groups of girls walk through town with identical, loose-fitting trousers which they bought for a rip-off at some night market. I understand they're comfortable, I understand they might seem cool to you and your friends on this trip, but personally, I can't bring myself to wear them. If I'm not okay wearing something in public at home, I won't wear it here.

I eat a simple, cheap dinner, for I still can't taste anything - just sweetness and saltiness - and when I get back to my hotel there are three locals sitting out the front, two are playing guitar and singing Lao ballads, and the other summons me over.

"Hey, Mr. Falang! Sit. Sit. Here.", he hands me a bottle of water.

I take a wary swig, and, as I had presumed, it's local rice moonshine. Without stopping his playing, one of the others laughs as I grimace post-swig, "haha..Lao whiskey!".

I go over the road and bring back a couple of longnecks, I figure it's my last night in Laos, I should have a few BeerLao to mark the occasion.

The one not playing or singing is covered neck to toe in hand-made tattoos (quite tasteful ones at that), his fingernails are painted red, his cheeks are pock-marked, his finger boasts a large gem-studded gold ring, and he's obviously quite far gone on his Lao whiskey (called 'LaoLao' colloqually).

"Hey Mr. Falang! You from Australia? I Lao. I Mr. Lao!", he enthusiastically gestures. "You in Laos. I look after youuuu. Good good. You want marry-warna? I get you marry-warna, opium, Ya ba. You want? I have 10 kilogram marry-warna. I take care of youuu", he tells me. That's right, the golden triangle. I'd forgotten.

I don't buy his 10 kilograms of marijuana, but I do stay a while, drinking LaoLao and beer, chatting, and admiring Mr. Lao's jungle log which he has varnished and prepared himself and is obviously so very proud of. "You want? Byoooooteeful. You buy? Look, look, byoooteeful", he says as he props the log up on the table and strokes it up and down, running his tattooed fingers along the grains and imperfections of the dark timber.

A Thai reggae number the three sang out the front of my hotel


The boat, feat. rooster


Mr. Lao and his log

Tuesday, 28 January 2014

Day 33 (05/01): Luang Prabang - Pakbeng, Laos

Day 33 (05/01)

From the courtyard of my guest house I watch Luang Prabang's magical almsgiving ceremony one last time. A pick-up truck transfers me to the longboat 'pier' outside of town (just a dirt path down a steep river bank, really) for the start of my two-day boat journey up the Mekong to the Thai border.

I'm all clogged up and sick still, with a runny nose, a sore throat, and blocked ears, but I'm trying to avoid any drugs.

On the truck out to the pier I have a moment of doubt. 'Shit. Do I have both my passports?', I suddenly think to myself, aware of the possibility I may have left one passport with the guest house when checking in. But my heart resumes its normal beat when I reach into my valuables bag and feel the shape of two hard passports with my fingers. I've had half a dozen or so of these heart-in-your-throat moments on this trip. There are many things which you can lose with not too much of a bother, but your passport or your credit cards are not ones. One time, in Sihanoukville, I had slid my credit cards between the pages of a book before going out to a bar with Nic, just to be safe, but had forgotten this by the morning. This led to a half hour of frenzied searching through every single thing I own, before locating the rectangles of plastic.

I'm used to it being cold by now, and this morning is no exception. As we put out into the muddy river, the clouds hang low on the dark green mountains, reluctant to budge, defying the hot, rising sun.

I had read that some boats on this route have hard seats, but I'm glad to find myself in a soft upholstered chair (make-shift, taken out of a bus, nonetheless), and I pull out my book in preparation for an 8 or 9 hour ride ahead. Next to me a daddy-complex Australian couple are French kissing and heavy petting, disturbing the sensibilities of the modest Buddhist locals which staff the boat. But they're oblivious to the Lao, and the stunning countryside passing by them as they suck one another's face.

We pass great folds of jungle mountains, riverside houses and tiny villages with no electricity or land access, fishermen tending to nets, and giant teak trees emerging from the forest canopy.

A talkative Malaysian family is seated in front of me, the husband is napping and the wife and who I assume is her sister are holding his head upright so he can snooze while they chat away. That is love, I think to myself.

We're in the middle of the dry season – you can see the high water mark on the banks and the rocks – and large, treacherous rocks stick up out of the brown current, and it's not a simple course up the river for the boat. I had imagined a wide river casually flowing down through Laos, but there are whirlpools and currents, rocks and eddies.

I finish Stephen Fry's 'Moab is My Washpot', and, most likely through my vanity, can't help but see similarities between him and me. He's very analytical, possibly to a fault, like I am.

The old Malaysian man is awake now and we happen to make eye-contact.

He asks me a number of questions - “where you from?” “what you doing here?” “how long you travelling?” “when you go home?” “which city in Australia?” - to which I answer briefly.

He tells me how he “has a student” living in Perth, studying pharmacy.

I stare out at the thick steep jungle which angles up from the banks of this big river and I wonder what each of the trees are. I wonder how many plants and animals and insects are in there which are not even known to science. This, I feel, is very remote countryside.

The old man turns to me and asks “where you from?” “how long you travelling?” and tells me how he has a student studying pharmacy in Perth.

He suffers from dementia.

“What's that called in English?” he asks me, pointing.

“Forest”, I say.

“Very beautiful. Very beautiful”.

His wife strokes his head, and he closes his eyes. She covers his ears while her sister props his head up so he can snooze some more.

I can see locals walking along the river's edge, up on the steep sand, wearing sarongs. And buffalo bathe where the water is still, and kids play and men go past us in their small fishing boats.

We put in at Pakbeng, a very small one-street town which only really exists as a half-way point for the boats between Luang Prabang and the Thai border.

It's a quiet place with not much to do. I buy BeerLao's dark variety, forgetting that I can't taste anything due to my sickness. I find the town's only pharmacy and buy a decongestant and pain killer.

Pakbeng is in the golden triangle, and on my short  three minute walk back to my guest house from the pharmacy I'm propositioned several times.

“Marry-warna sir? You wanna smoke opium?”

Opium?! Opium! Did not realise people still smoked that stuff.

I'm hoping for a decent sleep as it's another 9 or 10 hours on the river tomorrow.







Day 32 (04/01): Luang Prabang, Laos

Day 32 (04/01)

It's still uncomfortably cold in the mornings, and I'm in the back of a 'Sǎwngthǎew' truck with a group made up of four Germans, two Swiss girls, one Spaniard and two Hmong men who are to be our guides on a one-day trek in the mountains outside Luang Prabang.

When I arrived in Luang Prabang I had already booked, and paid for, a two-day overnight hike. I had been thoroughly excited about the prospect of home-staying with a Hmong family in a village with no electricity in the cold Laos mountains, but yesterday the two others in the group pulled out, leaving me with the option of either joining a three-day two-night trek, or this one day affair. Three days would be too expensive and would kick my plans out of whack and make it difficult for me to make it to Thailand when I want to.

So, a one-dayer it is. And my disappointment is dispelled once we're winding up through the misty jungle-covered mountains. We're overtaken by Hmong girls dressed in colourfel traditional costumes on their scooters, mountain peaks are intermittently seen through gaps in the mist, logging trucks rumble down past us, and we all have goosebumps.

We're dropped off in a small village of bamboo huts, and our guides inform us we are in a Khmu village. The Khmu people are the indigenous inhabitants of Northern Laos, and our guides, who also speak Khmu, show us through the village.

We continue on up the road, through a school and into a Hmong settlement. As we turn the corner to enter the village we see young boys and girls dressed in elaborate, ornate, colourful dress, no two the same. Our Hmong guides, with their pleasant, happy faces, tell us this is the Hmong New Year celebration. There are two lines, facing each other, and the young Hmong, dressed ever so wonderfully, throw and catch balls to each other in pairs. This, I'm told, is Hmong courtship, and the balls are tossed back and forth for days.

My, we've been lucky to come here at this time of year.

"You want wife?", one guide asks me, with a grin.
"Very many pretty girl. Wanna throw the ball?", he continues, cheekily.

Sometimes I wish it were that simple. Go to a village dance, pick a girl you fancy, throw a ball back and forth for a couple of days, get married. Actually, I guess we actually do something along those lines already.

We admire the event, and the vibrant costumes, for a little while, and continue on up through the village, past some men training their fighting cocks, and into the jungle and further up into the mist-shrouded mountains.

I'm feeling more ill today - my throat is sore, my glands are swollen, I have a cough, a slight fever, and my nose is blocked so I'm denied the pleasure of smelling the mountain air. The guide I'm talking to up the front (the Germans are lagging ridiculously far behind, seemingly struck by a desire to photograph every square inch of the environment) picks a green fruit from a tree and tells me to chew on it.

"Forest sour fruit. Good for cold".

I chew on it as I walk on, and he tells me about the animals of the forest, and how when he was a child he ate bear, and monkey, and tiger. He also tells me of a group of Hmong living near where his village is, deep in the jungle near the Thai border, who, he claims, live a hunter gatherer lifestyle naked in the wild.

"One boy from my village saw a naked girl when he was hunting far far away from village. He stole her and took her for wife. They gave her sticky rice...haha...only after one month did she learn to eat it..haha", he tells me as we trek on through the dappled jungle light.

Just stealing a wife. Now, that's much easier than throwing a ball for days.

After a track-side lunch we descend the hill we just climbed and past a turquoise spring, then down into more open country and eventually reach the shallow limestone pools at the top of the Kuang Si Falls. The others swim in the gorgeous pools at the bottom of the falls, joining in with the crazy dare-devil macho Australians back-flipping and swinging off a rope-swing into the cold water. But I opt out of a swim - something rare for me - as I'm feeling even more ill now.

Is a little part of this choice not to swim, I query myself, not down to your body issues and insecurities when faced with the machismo of those Aussie jocks? Yeah, probably.

We drive back down into town after waiting too long for the Germans to finish taking more photographs, and I decide on turning in early. Not, of course, before one more noodle soup with plenty of chili.

I talk briefly to the lovely guest-house owner and her son before retiring to my bamboo enclosure.

Today's trek through villages of minority tribes makes me want to travel to the old Latvian communities in Siberia. I really must do that train journey soon.

I feel I want to see more of Laos than I have already planned, but it's not going to be possible. Wherever I've been I've been one of many tourists, always in comfortable situations. Does that make me unadventurous? Maybe. But then I remember I'm travelling for the sake of travelling, taking the long way home, participating in a self-created rite-of-passage, a transition, a two-month therapy session. And yes, I am thinking a lot, and questioning and facing some demons. To do that I don't need to be out in places with no electricity and no tourists. It suffices to be moving, going through the motions, changing my environment, breezing through, relaxing, being gentle on myself yet firm at the same time.

Tomorrow time for another change of scenery. Up the Mekong by boat.



Our Hmong guides

A traditional Khmu house

Even the Hmong play Petanque

Dressed to play ball

Hmong courtship

Fighting roosters

Traditional Hmong house



I don't know what this is, but I was told to chew it to help my sore throat




My bamboo room

Day 31 (03/01): Luang Prabang, Laos

Day 31 (03/01)

To witness Luang Prabang's most popular attraction, the almsgiving ceremony, – more popular than the scenic river views, or the numerous ornate temples clustered on the peninsula – one must wake before dawn. I set my alarm for five, but it's four o'clock in my bamboo-panelled room when I'm woken by the clear ringing of a gong. I assume it's from the temple opposite us – 'Wat Paphaimisaiyaram' – as the monks stir. The pitch sets half a dozen dogs off into a wailing chorus, and when they've finally calmed down, the guttural chanting of monks can be heard.

I sleep another hour before my alarm wakes me and outside - I strain my ears - it's quiet once more. Wiping the sleep from my eyes I go down into the front courtyard where I find the landlady's son squatting and warming his hands at the small crackling wood-fired stove (the temperature at night has dropped to around 7 or 8 degrees, unprecedented, I'm told, for this town). On the stove a pot of boiling water pushes steam up through a bamboo rice-basket.
“For the monks?”, I ask him.
“Yes. Sticky rice”, he smiles back at me.

"The staple food of the Lao is steamed sticky rice, which is eaten by hand. In fact, the Lao eat more sticky rice than any other people in the world. Sticky rice is considered the essence of what it means to be "Lao" — sometimes the Lao even referred to themselves as "Luk Khao Niaow", which can be translated as "children/descendants of sticky rice". - Wikipedia

A Greek business-owner on the main street yesterday told me all the 'action' of the almsgiving ceremony takes place between 5 and 5:30.

“No. At 6 the monks come out of the temple”, I'm now told with assurance.
Marie-Josée is up now too, rubbing her eyes, thinking she's missed the whole event. I reassure her we have some time to wait, so we all sit by the fire and warm our hands, watching and listening to the ever-growing activity – the shuffles and sweeps and the odd flash of orange – in the courtyard of the temple opposite. We can smell the sweet aroma of the sticky rice cooking.

The landlady is up now and occasionally takes the basket off the steam, shakes it, and puts it back. The rice is purple.

“Sticky rice, with coconut, and sugar. For the monks. Here. Try.”, she spoons a portion into a bowl for us to eat with our fingers, and as we do our attention is called to a 'tokkk-tokk-tok-tok-tok-tk-tk-tk-tk-tk-tk” of a young monk's hammering of a pole into the face of a large drum.

We open the gate and stand at the steps to watch a saffron-orange procession silently file out of the temple grounds and down the street.

Marie-Josée and I walk the 20 metres up to where our street intersects with the main drag; where most of the tourists congregate every morning to get their glimpse of this ancient ritual. The Greek man yesterday told me this is the best place to view the ceremony, and there certainly is a bit of hustle and bustle going on.

There's a line of tourists and a few locals, kneeling in a line behind their alms of sticky rice and fruit waiting for the monks, waiting to participate for whatever different reasons they all have.

We see the first orange-robed monk padding barefoot in our direction, stopping occasionally to take balls of sticky rice or a banana, and placing it in his almsbowl. The others following him do the same.

Meanwhile, camera flashes are going off and I can hear the digital schhickkkk soundbite from smart phones. This is all interrupting and distracting from what I hoped would be a serene, tranquil, silent morning.

The monks, expressionless, continue on their way, following a tradition repeated every single morning for probably as long as this gorgeous city has existed. And a French man leans in between two monks, causing one to stop briefly, to take a snap. Another 'falang' squats briefly directly in front of the first monk to get what he must believe is a sweet photographic angle.

That same mix of embarrassment, disgust, and bewilderment return to me from my visit to Angkor. But this time it's worse. These tangerine-robed photo-opportunities aren't made of hewn stone, they're not emotionless, conscious-void objects. They're people. This shouldn't be a spectacle – Marie-Josée likens it to a zoo – but it's become one, and I'm embarrassed to be here watching it as a tourist myself.

A Korean man, Nikon held up to his eye, lets off a dawn-shattering flash – ca-lickkk – not 20 centimetres from a monk's serene face.

Important information on morning alms giving [from leaflet]

The morning alms round (in Lao: Tak Bat) is a living Buddhist tradition for the people of Luang Prabang which, because of its beauty, has become a major tourist attraction. However, when tourists are unaware of its customs, their inappropriate behaviour can be disruptive. We would like to draw your attention to this religious practice, which has great meaning for the population of Luang Prabang.

How to respect the Tak Bat
  • Observe the ritual in silence and contribute an offering only if it is meaningful for you and can do so respectfully.
  • Please buy sticky rice at the local market earlier that morning rather than from street vendors along the monks' route.
  • If you do not wish to make an offering, please keep an appropriate distance and behave respectfully. Do not get in the way of the monks' procession or the believers' offerings.
  • Do not stand too close to the monks when taking photographs; camera flashes are very disturbing for both monks and the lay people.
  • Dress appropriately: shoulders, chest and legs should be covered.
  • Do not make physical contact with the monks.
  • Large buses are forbidden within the Luang Prabang World Heritage Site and are extremely disturbing. Do not follow the procession on a bus – you will stand above the monks which in Laos is disrespectful.

Take part in the almsgiving ceremony by protecting its dignity and its beauty. The community and the authorities of Luang Prabang thank you in advance of your collaboration.

Marie-Josée and I notice infractions of all but the last two of these points.

“I don't like this at all. I feel sick”, she tells me, beating me to the very same words.

I suggest we go back down the street to our guest house. This is a great decision because some of the monks cut down this side street from the main 'viewing' street and most of the tourists seem to not be bothered venturing any further. So it's just us, and occasionally one or two other tourists scurrying quietly past to another popular viewing street. We get the quiet, serene, dawn procession we wanted and what all the tourists are supposed to be looking for.

You can hear the pit pat of the monks' bare feet as they file past, dropping some of their collected alms into boxes in front of what I can only guess are homeless or terribly poor children. One of the older monks feeds a dog which has been following him, another smiles at me warmly as I return a smile just as warm. The knot in our stomachs has untangled.

I'm lucky I inadvertently picked a guest house opposite a minor, yet no less gorgeous, temple. The aesthetic of the orange robe is really quite pleasing, and a dash and flash of warm colour is a regular part of the Luang Prabang city scenery. Sometimes it's a monk of 8 or 9 sitting in temple grounds studying, or a couple of teenage monks looking at mobile phones behind a glass cabinet in the market. Right now it's long lines of orange gliding silently through this cold, misty morning.

This is, I must admit, a very touristy town. But it keeps its integrity and is not lost to gimmicks. And, as with all touristy cities/towns/regions, it only takes a small effort, a little initiative, and that so-damned-cliche open mind, to easily find an 'authentic' experience.

Before I head out for a walk about town, Marie-Josée relates to me a French saying told to her by her Vietnamese friend, which reveals some hint of the difference between the peoples of Indochina:

The Vietnamese plant the rice, the Cambodians watch it grow, the Lao listen to it grow.

I climb up the hill in the centre of town - Mount Phou Si - upon which is perched the temple Wat Chom Si. Up here one an take in a panoramic view of the small, narrow city, the mountains, and the two rivers which meet here.

A place as beautiful as this makes me rue the day my computer broke, for I'm inspired to type and type and type. I just have to wait for Thailand to get it fixed. For now, a notepad will have to do.

I pass some of the many temples in this city, and find a small alley to sit down for a noodle soup. The noodles here are hand-made, and I spice the shit out of the soup in an attempt to combat what feels like an oncoming illness. I mimic a local lady next to me who adds crushed peanuts, sugar, soy sauce, and dried chilli with oil to her soup. The trick with a noodle soup, I discover, is to customise that bad boy, to crank up the condiments. While I eat I watch a man skilfully shoot a sparrow from a tree with a slingshot, then swiftly break its neck. An orange robe flashes past us.

I'm keen to try out a Laotian herbal sauna, and I find the Lao Red Cross building, an old wooden thing. First, for 5 dollars I get an hour-long herbal massage. I'm glad I get a man, his strong hands are just what my muscles are craving, and I wince with pain and pleasure as I'm kneaded and twisted and pummeled.

After the massage I'm directed to the sauna. It's called a sauna, but really it's a steam room – a small box crammed with half-naked Laotians, herbal-scented steam rising up from the floor.

I'm given a sarong and a small towel for the sweat. There are male and female steam rooms, and free herbal tea is provided. I sit in the steam, and I can make out glistening flesh, and feel the presence of seven other men, and they're all bantering and laughing. A sauna is really a great social leveller, and I imagine what they're talking about and what they're laughing at is pretty much the same as Latvian men in their pirtis or Russians in their banyas, Finns in their saunas, or Japanese in their public baths.

I'm liking the smell of the numerous herbs – I only recognise lemon-grass though, and maybe I sense kaffir lime – but I am missing the heat control that a Finnish style sauna gives you – the controlled pauses, the heat extreme, the existential ecstasy of plunging into cold water or snow after.

I drink the tea down with relish, and I go in three or four times. Afterwards, my skin is supple and soft, and my forehead, like after any sauna session, is taught. I stroke my forehead and smell my skin as I eat my eating my second chilli-heavy noodle soup of the day, savoring that post-sauna euphoria that is so excruciatingly ephemeral.

Sticky rice for the monks

Right out front



View from the mount




The humble guest house

Lao textiles in the night market



Monday, 27 January 2014

Day 30 (02/01): Vang Vieng - Luang Prabang, Laos

Day 30 (02/01)

I'm in another minivan this morning, and its a cramped ride up into the mountains to Luang Prabang, but the scenery is stunning. Just when you think the mountains are already spectacular enough, they get bigger.

The bus station in Luang Prabang is a little way out of town, and I get stitched up by a tuk-tuk. Turns out I pay him too much, and he only takes me to see his brother's guest house, and then drives off leaving me a kilometre out of town. The guest house is too expensive, but they're persistent. "What you want to pay sir? What your price?"
"Too low for you my friend."

And in that moment of frustrated defiance, I make friends with a friendly, softly-spoken Québécois lady who was also gypped by the tuk tuk, and we decide to join forces to find an affordable guest house in a nice part of town.

This task, we discover, is not easy. You see, Luang Prabang, because of its charm and beauty and quaintness, and because there is also an airport here, has become quite the high-end destination, and a cheap guest house in a convenient part of town is hard to come across. But one recommendation I pilfered from the net yesterday turns out to be very satisfying. It's a traditional Laotian wood-slat house, in a cute side street in the centre of town, directly opposite a small Buddhist temple, and the price is right. Marie-Josée is on a tighter budget than I am, and even this place doesn't meet her criteria, but it will have to do for the night, she concedes [she never does find a cheaper place]. The house has been partitioned off with bamboo walls (every little noise can be heard through them), the showers are cold, the toilets aren't what you'd call clean, the mattresses are hard, the blankets are too short, but I'm positively chuffed.

We go for a walk in the last hour of sunlight, and discover the charming architecture which features on every street in this narrow peninsula at the confluence of the Nam Khan and Mekong rivers, and as night settles in, the yellow street lights gift the whole town a sweet, comfortable, quaint ambiance.

We cut back across the main street in town and while Marie-Josée takes some money out I get talking to a local guy handing out flyers for a cafe.

"Are you from Luang Prabang my friend?", I ask him as I wait.
"Me. No. I'm from village in mountains. I Hmong", he replies proudly, smiling.

I had read about the Hmong people (pronounced 'Mong' which is always a little uncomfortable for me to say), and that they live in considerable numbers in the North of Laos, but this is the first Hmong I have met. We chat a little more.

The Hmong people were recruited by the CIA to help fight invading military forces during the Secret War, and since then the Laos government has persecuted them and their descendents. Many fled to neighbouring Thailand and even the United States, and there are still reports that some communities in the mountains here in Laos are attacked regularly, and secretly, by Laotian military forces. You can read more about it in the Wikipedia entry.

In our aimless, curious wanderings, we come across an illuminated bamboo bridge across the small Nam Khan river, and find a restaurant to have our dinner. The Luang Prabang region has its own well-known cuisine, and I choose a local style of soup. I've been eating a few noodle soups on my journey, but this one is the best yet. There's a hint of something reminiscent of dill, and there are pork crackling croutons. Yes, pork crackling floating in the flipping soup. I'm in love with this town purely because of this.

While we eat, a boy of about four goes around to each table, stands mute, and gestures at his feet. He's wanting to bring our attention to the fact, which he's obviously proud about, that he has six toes on each foot.

And, what would you know, right out the front of the guest-house when I return, I see Lauren and Chris. This isn't called the backpacker trail for nothing.

The mountains of Northern Laos

Luang Prabang architecture

"I Hmong"

By the Mekong once again

Nearly on every building


Day 29 (01/01): Vang Vieng, Laos

Day 29 (01/01)

Comforting my OCD tendencies but entirely unplanned, I realise the first of January is exactly the half-way point of my trip.

Out on the street, when I'm finally mobile and ready to venture out, local girls ride by on their scooters with umbrellas shading their delicate features. How lovely.

I walk down through town to the same bar we were at last night as last year finished. During the day it's a quiet place, with shaded hammocks overlooking the river and those hills which still stun me every time I see them.

This town really isn't big, and Chris and Lauren and Ross are all here, already set up in their hammocks, nursing their sore heads. I climb into a hammock next to Ross, and as I get through more of charming Stephen Fry's wonderful memoirs, I also talk to Ross, well, he talks to me. He used to be a consultant for Big Pharma but after getting sick of the gig and how it conflicted with his own morals, he threw in the towel and set sail, as it were, to see the world. I'm inspired to backpack South America after hearing his stories of Peru, Bolivia, Ushaiai, and other places usually so far from my thoughts.

I'm starting to worry that Chris and Lauren actually like Craig, but as they start to feel perky again, and in Craig's absence (he's continuing his seduction of Karina the Norwegian up in a hot-air balloon, I'm not kidding) they tell me, diplomatically, what they think.

"You know, that Craig, god he can be annoying. But he's been through a lot, you can't blame him, sounds like that girl really screwed him. I wouldn't ever hang out with someone like that, but he's a nice guy, he means no harm".

I guess they're right. In most other circumstances I wouldn't seek out his company either, but he hasn't done anything wrong, I do hope the hot-air balloon ride pays off for him.

We get some dinner and the restaurant plays an eclectic soundtrack to our meal - Puccini, Tu-Pac, Adele, Eminem.

The day's almost done, it was spent lazily gazing from a hammock at the river and the hills, and a fruit shake on my walk back to the guest house makes me feel recovered finally, and I look forward to my next stop, my first stop on this second half of my trip and the place in Laos I've been looking forward to the most, Luang Prabang.

Those hills, and Craig in his balloon


Day 28 (31/12): Vang Vieng, Laos

Day 28 (31/12)

At the height of Vang Vieng's drug-fuelled partying era, the thing to do was tubing. You get dropped off a few kilometres upstream with a tractor inner tube, and you float down to town, stopping at any of the numerous bars on the way to drink buckets of cocktails, swallow hallucinogens, and zip-line from precarious platforms into the rock-filled water. This was why scores of backpackers met their end every year in the waters of Vang Vieng, and why now there are only three bars left (one oddly owned by the local chief of police) along the river and the drugs far less freely available. These days, the demographic has shifted from revelling backpackers to families and Asian tourists. Tubing, while still possible, is only practised by a few.

Today I'm in a group of five couples (three of them Korean), myself, and one seven-foot African American man (“hey, why you so big mister?” asks our tour guide entirely sincerely, “what you eat to get so big?”) and we're being driven up along the Nam Song river to a cave which run under a limestone hill.

We strip down to our shorts, grab an inner tube, fix a head-lamp on, grasp the rope which leads into the dark cave, and plunge our behinds into the icy water to explore the dark water-filled caverns.

At the furthest point into the cave the rope allows us to venture, we're instructed to switch off our head lamps, and the sensory deprivation is intense and the feeling is all consuming. I'm reminded of when Nic, the American, told me about his experience in a sensory deprivation capsule and the effects he described are similar to what I know about the effects of psychedelics. Curious. This begs a quote from an intriguing article by the neuroscientist and public intellectual Sam Harris:

There is nothing that one can experience on a drug that is not, at some level, an expression of the brain’s potential. Hence, whatever one has experienced after ingesting a drug like LSD is likely to have been experienced, by someone, somewhere, without it. - samharris.org

Later, after we dry off, warm up, and have our lunch, we're driven down the river a bit where we start the kayaking back into town. The weather is clear and warm, the water, splashing up as we navigate the relatively easy rapids, is cool, the limestone karsts shimmer in the early afternoon heat up over our right shoulders, and I'm in the back of a two-man kayak, relishing my steering duties, pretending these rapids are harder and more treacherous than they really are.

Along the way we stop at one of the three remaining 'tubing' bars. There are a handful of backpackers, already on their first uneasy steps to severe inebriation, telling anecdotes and trying to party like its 2011 in Vang Vieng, but its the last day of 2013 and these rivers have been calm for over a year, and this bar is currently filled out mostly by quiet Koreans - sipping water and taking photographs of the mountains - and the underemployed staff playing Petanque behind the bar.

We get back to town and I definitely need a snooze if I hope to see the first moments of next year.

I'm waiting out the front of the Irish bar, its six o'clock as we had agreed last night, and neither Craig nor Chris and his girlfriend are here. They're not here 20 minutes later either, and I stand on the street like a mug, and I'm damning them, and damning myself, and resigning myself to the prospect of seeing in the new year in my bungalow with a fifth of Lao whiskey, a longneck, a lonely game of solitaire and a wretched mood.

Craig arrives and I'm relieved and feel silly I ever thought those tragic thoughts. He's with an American guy, Ross from Philly, he looks nice at first glance, with intelligent eyes. A few moment later Chris and Lauren arrive.

“Hi Martin! You've been waiting long?”
“Hi. Nah, just a few moments”, I say, of course.

As we eat dinner and work out our plan of attack for this final night of the year, we get to talking to a couple from Adelaide at the next table – Bell (yes, Bell) from Waikerie and Jason from McLaren Vale. They join us and we're now seven. A veritable fucking snowball. To think not an hour ago I was convinced I would be by myself tonight.

Craig tells us he's on a three month trip alone which he was supposed to be on with his now ex-girlfriend. Everything has been planned and paid for already, for two people, and Craig is just getting on with it. He's hurting, and the only way he knows how to deal with it is make friends, pooh-pooh his ex, pretend he's all okay, tell exaggerated tales, and relate every single conversation in the group back to himself.

Craig, nonetheless, successfully works his Australian charm and before long we're an optimistic, bright-eyed group of 11 after the addition of two Norwegian sisters – Karina and Molly – and two crazy, fiery Thai girls – Rain and Olive. We're down in the only surviving bar on the island in the river drinking buckets of cocktails, and slowly the number of revellers grows as all the loners, all the people who not long ago, like me, thought they might end up finishing their year on a mildly melancholy note, are with us. And at midnight we fire off the giant party popper cannons the locals set off at weddings and hug all these strangers with sincere ecstasy.

As with all New Years Eves, after midnight time moves with a different cadence, and by two we are in a dark bar on the main road slowly sipping beers we realise we don't even want, and the group has fired off the tired, the weak, and the sensible, leaving a nucleus of me, Craig and the two Norwegian sisters. Craig's talking about himself still – he hasn't stopped – and he's doing well with one of the sisters. The other sister confides in me she's worried what her sibling's getting herself into, so I leave them all to it and stumble in the direction of my guest house.

On the way I meet two Russian guys, who are obliging when I ask them to help me finish my beer, and we chat about Russia and Latvia and travelling. They are on touring motorbikes, making their way down through Laos from North to South.

I continue on home.

A ladyboy (correct nomenclature being 'kathoey') is standing in my path. She drags a plastic chair out and motions for me to sit. I sit. I don't know why, but I sit, and at the table are two Finns, and one other ladyboy. The one next to me pours me a beer.

“I won't pay for that though. I didn't order it”, I say defensively.
“Don't worry. Drink. Happy New Year”, she tells me, with a smile, and sits down herself.

I talk to the two Finnish guys, but its generally stupid banter. It's four in the morning on New Years Day after all. I need to get back to the guest house. Next to me my neighbour ask, with a searching raised eyebrow, “now we go massage?”.
I look over my shoulder to where she's gesturing and I see we're sitting out front of a massage parlour. A 'massage' from a ladyboy at four in the morning, I suspect, means only one thing.
“Ah, no thank you. Thanks for the beer, Happy New Year", I say with as much tact as I can muster.

I rise, and say good bye to the Finns and the lady boys, find my bearings again and set my coordinates for a dreamless sleep that will bring me into the daylight of a new year, a year I'm looking no less forward to than any other. A year that will bring me back to Australia, and who knows what else.


Entrance to the cave

Happy kayaker

Many tourists forget this is a modest Buddhist country


Sunday, 26 January 2014

Day 27 (30/12): Vientiane - Vang Vieng, Laos

Day 27 (30/12)

This morning my destination is Vang Vieng, once host to a crazy backpacker splitting-heads-open-on-river-rocks-while-wasted party scene, it seems to be a bit more chilled now, but still a good bet for a decent New Years party.

A tuk tuk picks me and a few others up from the hostel and after the typical weaving through backstreets and making more pick-ups, we're unloaded onto a rather comfortable bus for the ride North.

I've chosen to spend three nights in Vang Vieng (I figure I won't want to be in a cramped minivan on the 1st of January with what surely will be a decent hangover). I really do hope this isn't a mistake, as I have to stay whether I like it or not as I booked for all three nights from fear of lack of accommodation when arriving.

On the bus I get talking casually to Craig, a 30-year-old Australian jock, but after a few polite where-are-you-travelling niceties, he spends most of the trip talking to a young South African couple.

I finish a book I bought back in a London charity store, a Rolling Stone collection of articles on Johnny Cash, and in that dazed state one gets himself into upon finishing a book, I notice the mountains of Laos pushing up out of the rice-fields ahead.

I read of Johnny Cash's cover of 'City of New Orleans', and this plays in my head (I know it's not relevant, but it's a good song when moving) as the bus winds up through the ever-growing mountains.

Good morning America how are you?
Don't you know me I'm your native son,
I'm the train they call The City of New Orleans,
I'll be gone five hundred miles when the day is done.

And the rice paddies become smaller and smaller, until they're but minor plots wedged where possible between a tangle of mountainous jungle, and the bus changes down gears to tackle the gradient.

We drive into Vang Vieng, and I notice locals playing Petanque (a very common game all through Cambodia and Laos thanks to the French legacy), and out to the left we get a glimpse of the spectacular karst limestone peaks which make up the backdrop of this town, like strokes of watercolour in varying shades of grey.

I find it very difficult to locate my guesthouse and get lost in an outskirt region of the town, but I'm glad I'm lost as I happen upon a temple where young monks are doing their afternoon drumming on a gigantic skin-covered drum. And I find the guest house eventually, and drop my bags, and walk to the main strip, rarely casting my gaze away from those mesmerising mountains.

On the way, I pop into a hardware store to find a piece of rope to use as a strap for my camera as I plan on kayaking and caving tomorrow. I only need 15 centimetres or so, and the man gives it to me for free. After travelling for four weeks and expecting a price for any service, this small gesture makes my day.

The main strip of Vang Vieng - much quieter than it used to be I gather - features several 'TV bars' which show non-stop re-runs of episodes of Friends and Family Guy. I lounge on pillows, order a BeerLao, grab something forgettable to eat, and, embarrassingly, watch about four straight episodes of Friends before I will myself up and back onto the street.

Not half a dozen steps from the front of the bar I run into Craig, the Australian from the bus, and he takes me along to the token Irish Bar to meet up with the young South African couple (I find out the girl is English and the guy, with a splendid accent, is South African).

I like the young couple, but Craig, well Craig talks about himself ad nauseam (yes yes, I know, we can all be guilty of this occasionally), but I don't want to be lonely on New Year's, and he's not all that bad, so I agree to meet up with them all tomorrow to nut out a plan for bringing in the New Year.




Laotian mountains start to appear

The ruins of what once was a pumping party island

This is what brought travellers here in the first place

Friends, Friends, and more Friends

The river

Day 26 (29/12): Vientiane, Laos

Day 26 (29/12)

This, I realise as I'm lying here on this hard mattress, is my first time in a hostel dorm since my small backpacking trip in Europe way back in 2005. If I'm not wrong, that last hostel was in Amsterdam. Oh my lordy, I just calculated, I was 18.

I also remember how much I hate the top bunk.

One of the guys from my dorm shows me where I can rent a bike and we decide to spend the day together riding about. He's travelling by himself too, so we're too lonely travellers, coasting through the rather empty wide streets of Vientiane. His name is France, and he's from Borneo, Indonesia (later, I ask him what he thinks about his country's invasion of East Timor, of which, it turns out, he has never heard).

It's interesting to note the demographics of backpackers, one can see which countries has a growing middle class with the expendable income to travel. I notice more Indian travellers, MANY South Koreans, Chinese, Israelis, Japanese, and, interestingly, few Australians (although, they may be all concentrated in Europe).

France and I stop and climb the Patuxai gate. The city is quiet, very little traffic, one way streets, many Buddhist temples, and gigantic, practically empty, government buildings

Vientiane, with its big statues of King Sisavong Vong, unnecessarily huge white government buildings, perfectly manicured gardens and parks, very little traffic and people, communist flags, and a stark contrast between opulence and near-poverty, reminds me of the brief time I spent in Belarus and Kharkov, Ukraine; two places not too far removed from the aesthetics of Soviet Russia.

This city, despite there being very little to do here, has a quaint atmosphere to it: a slight whiff of Social Realism, muddled with French colonial 'charm' (as the guidebooks put it), and its own unique brand of South East Asian-ness.

We soon realise there's not much to see in Vientiane after checking out a few of temples and riding along the bank of the Mekong which is very low and muddy now in what is now the dry season.

In the evening, after an eventful half-hour of dropping off our rental bikes (the bike man is missing so his neighbours break into his safe for our bond money), France and I walk to the riverside to drink a beer on the bank of the Mekong as the sun sets.

My fucking ankle is hurting, aching nearly all the time, from all this walking in thongs. It'  throbbing at the moment, and I marvel at how slow a joint heals. To think, nearly eight months have passed since I broke it.

The sun, the big red sun, sinks into Thailand on the other side of the Mekong. Now, a sunset pretty much anywhere is worth the time spent watching it, but this, this sunset, this sun, steeped in the haze of 750,000 Laotians cooking dinner with wood-fired stoves, this sunset is something I've never seen the likes of. The orb is giant, it's big and consuming, and the whole riverside, its people and things, gazeat this daily ritual. It floats, and sinks into the murk, and disappears into Thailand, my next country.

Then the riverside evening line-dancing work-outs start. We walk past the line-dancers, get some street food, I buy a cheap Casio rip-off watch (which I'm delighted about), and, realising there's not much else to do here, funnily, in the capital of Laos, we head back to the hostel.

There is one detour. We notice searchlights scouring the night sky, and follow the source. We find a big disco, held in the grounds of the National Culture Hall. This is a purely local affair, with DJs, BeerLao branding on every square inch available, and a curious merging of West and East, loud and restrained, Laotian and a copy-of-a-copy of Western values.

Tomorrow, North.

Patuxai gate

A preposterously large government building

Through the gate's window

Pha That Luang

Reclining Buddha

Never the same through the lens